Last updated: 1 July, 2024 @ 16:16
To me, there’s few things better than a freshly shucked oyster – weighing heavy in the hand, the gently misted liquor spilling over the sides of the shell to race up the sleeve of your shirt.
A squeeze of lime and a few enthusiastic splashes of tabasco – that’s it for me. Nothing more is needed – other than an ice-cold beer – of course.
Chew and savour the simple, salty elegance of the plump oyster. Never shoot one, this isn’t tequila.
Like I say, to me, there are few things better.
Tried oysters: overrated
However, an unusually interesting conversion recently developed in a WhatsApp group I’m a member of.
The chat normal revolves around meaningless posts about football, curry or an ex-classmate who has been locked up for some misdemeanour or another.
Somehow, recently, the chat swayed to the topic of oysters.
A friend, living on the west coast of America posted an image of a half a dozen oysters sitting on top an iced platter with the caption: ‘Tried oysters. Still the most overrated food ever’.
The replies rapidly followed: ‘We’ll be in the minority here, but strongly agree 😂’
‘Me too 🤮’, came another.
Only one message nearly managed a case for the defence: ‘I quite like them from time to time with a bit of chopped onion salsa and tabasco…’
‘… but agreed, they’re not on the level of a fillet steak or rack of lamb though’.
Important questions when it comes to oysters
Now, as a seafood enthusiast my immediate thought was to jump in and start asking some important questions here.
For example, are we talking about pacific or native oysters?
Are we referring to oysters from Maldon, West Mersea, Brancaster, Poole, Ockran or elsewhere?
Are we talking about a fat, early spring oysters or a late summer ones weakened by the season’s spawning efforts?
With lemon, lime, tabasco, mignonette, Rockefeller…?
And, come on, where on earth have you seen oysters served up as an alternative menu choice to fillet steak or a rack of lamb?
The oyster has an image problem
I chose not to respond at all. The issue was clear to see. The oyster has an image problem, a marketing problem – as does much of the seafood found around our shores.
As Bobby Groves writes in the excellent Oyster Isles: A Journey Through Britain and Ireland’s Oysters:
‘Despite the mainland British Isles having over 11,000 miles of coastline and Ireland’s being around 4,500 miles in total, it has become apparent that we are not widely renowned for the oysters we produce in a world stage dominated by France, Asia Pacific and North America.
‘Apart from, a select few fisheries and farms in the British Isles, it really is the case that most people are simply unaware of our wonderful indigenous oysters, both domestically and internationally’.
Hard to swallow
It’s the ignorance and lack of awareness surrounding the superb produce right on our doorstep that’s the hardest thing to swallow – and not, my friends, the magnificent oyster.
Oyster Isles by Bobby Groves is available to buy at Amazon.